To answer or not?

“Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him yourself.
“Answer a fool according to his folly, or he will be wise in his own eyes.” Proverbs 26:4-5
On the surface these verses can appear confusing and contradictory. We are left asking the question, ‘So should I answer a fool according to his folly, or not?’ The answer is, it depends on the fool.
There are some people who are only ever looking for an argument or debate. They do not approach theological discussions with an open mind. Their goal is to humiliate those who believe in God, for entertainment and self-satisfaction. These are the people of whom Jesus said, “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces” (Matt. 7:6). We are not to waste our time, or the gospel truth, with these kinds of people.
Then there are other people who, while they may be misguided with regards to their views on God and spiritual things, do not have a completely closed mind. When someone says, “I don’t understand why God would allow babies to be born with severe deformities”, there may be opportunity there to help them understand. In these instances, we are to answer them using their own logic to show them their error. In the case of babies being born deformed, we can point out that deformities are a result of sin and the curse, that it is not God’s doing and that He loves that deformed baby all the same.
In the end, we need wisdom to know firstly whether to respond, and secondly how to respond.